152 PERSONALITIES.
Now the name of our c.o is Major Hoffe,
You approach him with a discreet cough.
Apart from many likeable ways,
He's likely to give you fourteen days,
So don't forget mossy's the latest craze.
Roll on that boat.
Mr. Tyas is the dear old Adj's name.
He's got one notable claim to fame.
If he had his way,
You'd do guards twice a day,
So really be careful what you say.
Roll on that boat.
Kellehan is the name of our learned M.O.,
Straight from the Emerald Isle, don't you know,
To him you must go if you suffer from fits,
Housemaids knee, Laryngitis, or just common shits,
But have someone outside to pick up the bits.
Roll on that boat.
Now Skevington's an armoury W.O.,
A very decent bloke as plumbers go.
His latest craze is to cover the sights,
So if your an armourer down on the flights,
Make sure you've got something in all the kites.
Roll on that boat.
Joe Sullivan's a man who we all admire,
He knows all the gen when the guns won't fire.
As an armoury sarge he really is spiffin,
He has all the books where they keep all the grif in,
He probably eats four by two for his tiffin,
Roll on that boat
From the S. W. O you might take a pattern,
He's a bit toffee nosed since he's got a new hat on,
His name's on the bottom of every guard list,
So if by a miracle you find that your missed,
Don't go and tell him, or he'll think your half pissed.
Roll on that boat.
Theres a sergeant discip, who's sometimes called Den,
He flutters about like a paralysed hen,
He comes around billets and inspects the floor,
For paper and dog ends, it's really a bore,
If he looked round the corner he'd find plenty more.
Roll on that boat.
Now Claude's a blood bloke, its hard to believe,
He returned ten days early from Calcutta leave,
If you've got a boil, or a pain in the head,
Don't go to Claude, or you'll wish you were dead,
Cause he'll probably give you a dose of white lead.
Roll on that boat.
The big shot in 'A' flight is Collis,
Behind his back you call him Horris.
700's are his favourie books,
So don't be a candidate for the hooks,
Sign on the line and get nice looks.
Roll on that boat.
Theres a friend of mine called sergeant Bus,
Who never makes the slightest fuss,
Let props drop off and mainplanes fall,
And Flight loos rave and engines stall,
It wouldn't worry him at all.
Roll on that boat.
Johnny Johnson's a bloke who I've known many years,
I must admit sometimes he's bored me to tears.
When he catches his eye on a rusty recoil,
His eyes they stick out and his bloods on the boil,
And he runs round to Echelon, and gets quarts of oil.
Roll on that boat.
Sergeant Moss is a rigger, a man of resource,
For twenty five years he's been takine a course.
He's shit hot at changing the wheels on a kite,
At home, when hes married, wife's due for a fright,
When he takes the wheels of the twins pram in the night.
Roll on that boat.
Theres a corporal who's name is Felgate,
He'll tread on you hard if your late.
If you're having a brew out in the sun,
He's bound to come out and spoil all the fun,
Cause its really and truly got to be done.
Roll on that boat.
Theres one of the lads, the Wolf is his name,
His language is always the sort you can't frame.
A bag full of mail he expects every day,
His wife is a journalist, so they say,
He writes every night till he hits the hay.
Roll on that boat.
Harold's an armourer, of hardy race,
He'll argue till he's blue in the face,
His language is awful I'm sorry to tell,
He often says damme and blast it as well,
In ten years time he might say bloody hell.
Roll on that boat.
Now Booglie crew is a bloke, who no doubt,
Is certain to blow all his front teeth out.
For the strain on his mouth is incredibly grim,
Cause he whistles out tunes with the greatest vim,
But hes bound to keep both of his lungs in trim.
Roll on that boat.
As a mender of watches, old Jack has no peer,
You can hand him your watch, and theres nothing to fear,
He takes then apart with the greatest of skill,
If you watch him at work, you can get quite a thrill,
When he starts to bore holes with a six inch drill.
Roll on that boat.
Louie Rainer's an artist, of whom were all proud,
If he's drawing a field, you might think its a cloud.
He takes size sixteen in his boots and his shoes,
If he commits murder, he's bound to leave clues,
So a word of advice Louie, cut out the booze.
Roll on that boat.
The next on the list is the jolly old Major,
By gad, Sir, he's blue blood all through, you can wager.
His silky moustache is the pride of his life,
But its bound to cause worry and trouble and strife,
When it gets in the way between him and his wife.
Roll on that boat.
Boxall's the bloke, who cuts all your hair.
For shooting his mouth, he's got quite a flair.
If the lights in your bashs are not quite right,
And you can't see the letters you wish to write,
Just blame old George, he's sure to bite.
Roll on that boat.
Stan pretty's a fitter of fame and renown.
In about thirty years he should get his crown.
Its bound to come in is favourite theme,
So beware if he's running some swindling scheme,
Cause Stan is the man who( ll skim all the cream.
Roll on that boat.
Smudger Smith is a chap, who is nicknamed the Horse.
On the flights he's well known for his dynamic force.
He's as strong as a bull, with massive great thighs,
When he was a baby he took the first prize,
But he can't see a thing, cause his hair's in his eyes.
Roll on that boat.
Charlie sayer's a bloke who's staid and who's steady,
He's always around when the chars nearly ready.
He runs round and round performing contortions,
On certain queer objects, which he calls abortions.
At the cookhouse he always receives double portions.
Roll on that boat.
Ginger Critchley's a man, who's as clean as can be.
His skin is the fairest that ere you did see.
He washes himself fourteen times every day.
His dhobi allowance never meets his outlay.
They say that on soap he spends all his pay.
Roll on that boat.
But the best of the bunch, I can hear your curses,
Is the man who wrote these lousy verses,
He's really and truly down on his knees,
Through senile decay, old age, and disease.
He daren't go out in the slightest breeze.
Roll on that boat
P. S.
If theres anyone else who aspires to be,
A subject of poetry, contact 303.
He'll make you immortal in verse and in rhyme,
The metre's superb, and the dictions sublime.
The fee is most reasonable, ten chips a time
Roll on that boat
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LAC. William Guy Cartledge (303) Passed away on the 1st October 1991
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